About Me

My Photo
jivan
chennai, tamil nadu, India
By proffession i am service Er.I have written fictions and novels. My ability is to write realistic fictions in different genre. Life/story, family fiction, Sci-Fi, political thriller, lesbian love, erotic, horror also about new religion!. UNIVERSAL LOVE the new religion! Happy reading... With kind regards, Author of Love is Eternal. (sci-fi love story) Jivan. Visit my blog http://.jivan.gather.com/ to read few pages of all my novels/ fiction/articles and photo gallery.
View my complete profile

Monday, December 24, 2007

UNIVERSAL LOVE . The New Religion . ( Part - One )

http://www.jivan.gather.com
UNIVERSAL LOVE THE NEW RELIGION. Myth v/s Reality. Author- Jivan.Controversial, God, Religion, Cast, Politic, Superstition, Science & Technology, philosophy, Myth, Reality and People at large! A must read for each and everyone.Thoughts provoking book about God & Religion v/s Science & Technology. God, Religion, Superstition, Politics, Science, Philosophy, Myth, Reality, People and the whole world! You have n't read any thing like this before. This book will take you through the roller costar ride .My sincere effort is to enlighten you! This book is written from my life's experience with God and religion. With real life experience I had explained and reasoned with rational thinking to overcome superstition. With the best of my knowledge you will find me empathizing the need for developing new religion. UNIVERSAL LOVE - THE NEW RELIGION! . SUB TITLES.1) God, Religion, Cast, Superstition..2) Theist & Atheist.3) Godman & Conman !4) Good times & Bad times.5) Vastusastra.6) Science & Technology.7) Democracy & Politics.8) Universal love…. The new religion! We atheists believe in science and technology. We all know that our planet was not formed in one day .we also have scientific evidence that god had not created neither human being nor any living organism. Five billion years ago there was a big bang. Only one big bang, Thank you. Madam! . Scientific evidence is the proof of this theory.Five billion years ago what was left in this universe? Absolutely nothing. Evolution is the answer for that. According to the theist god had created every living organism. If that was the case god had not made Adam and Eva first. According to the available scientific evidence suggests that god made dinosaurs and his (predecessors) 'ancestors'! The oldest fossils ever discovered is not more than 400 million yeas old (may be scientists will come up some other day older than that) proves this point. The oldest skeleton of human being is not more than 2,00,000 years old. One skeleton called Eva is the only available proof of that; Suggesting difference between an ape and human. Modern man emerged only 30,000 years ago; skeleton recently found in Sumatra Island proves this point. Are you still not convinced that man is evolved form Apes?
(1)
Travel all over India you might find the answer. Nowhere in the world you will find different kind of species (people) in all size and shape. Indigenously built! (Jock.). I am not fully convinced even though I believe in Charles Darwin theory of evolution. I had a doubt. "If man is evolved form Apes how comes Apes still remains an Ape?" the answer I found for that was very interesting. It says be it man or animal; it will only develop till it gets adapts to its environment. Once it adapts its environment it stops its further 'development' .I think except in some case with modern man. I hope scientists will one day come up with the missing link or intellectual design, till then one can go on fighting or debating on his theories. It is sad to note that even in U.S schools they do not teach Darwin theories any more because of opposition from religious people. These religious people always keep science away form religion. They prefer to keep people ignorant. More knowledge about the origin of universe and human being will spell doom for their business; for them ignorance of people is bliss. Here I like to quote Albert Einstein' words. "Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.". These words are supposed to be written in gold.If we go back in our history, you will find our primitive men prayed sun but not God.. When sun goes down his life also goes down!. I do not worship sun but in India Hindus still worship sun.. I can not think any thing more powerful than sun. I am not comparing sun for man made thermos nuclear reactor or any other thing but a nature made one. When I think about sun I fond most power full and at times it defy scientific theory. Let's look at it form the lay man's point of view .we all know to light fire we need minim two things. That is oxygen and material. I wonder at 15,00,000,00 K.M away from earth where is the oxygen? When sunburn at about 3000 degree centigrade oxygen is likely to stay hundreds of kilometers away. Then how come this methane or any other equivalent gas continues to burn for the past five billion years? Also it is estimated to burn for another five billion years! Think of its awesome power. Nothing in our solar system comes close to it. That is how I would like to describe it .sun is a marvelous natural phenomenon. I expect scientist to explain the mystery of sun in layman's language so that people can over come superstition about sun.. Our primitive man prayed sun and followed their basic instinct! In those day there were no god, religion, cast or creed. That proves God is man made. There were only tribal and terrible people. The person with sheer muscle power ruled the roost. . His knowledge or ignorance about the world brought progress or regress to his community. Even we see this trend even in our times. Powerful tribal warlords in Afghanistan and in some African countries are few examples. His words were considered as god's comments. In those days people had heard mentality.
(2)
We still have people with heard mentality when it comes to religion and politics. People looked at him like as a moral guide .his superstitious beliefs were followed by his community people. Later stage they prayed fire. Because not every body could produced fire so it was considered sacred and they started to worship. He also prayed natural or carved stone. Later these stone became their daities. Even our future generation will also worship such daities with out checking its power. (Blind belief) .In ancient times god and daities were made of stone or metals now in our modern times god illuminates with laser lights. Techno-gods! Man made rapid progress in creating superstition, god, religion, cast and creed. Different parts of the world we see different religion and cast system are the proof of that. Modern man is not more than fifty thousand years old. After that what happened to the god? He went on hibernation? What was he doing when national calamity or man made disasters strikes? Ww-1, ww-2. Etc. it was always science and technology or human compassion (UN) international community (now UN became butt of the jock, forget it) saved mankind form such calamities or disaster but certainly not god. After that only man made god (messenger of god) came to this planet. Be it Lord Krishna, Jesus or Allah. The point to note these men made God came only as a messenger of god to their respective religion. Not the representative of all mighty. I am sure with hundreds of religion across the world we will find no representative of god for some religion. Poor guys they do not have any thing to boost about. Unlike other religion where they worship one god, we Hindus have thousands of gods including daities. People all over the world worship creator of universe or if not the messenger of god. Lord Bhramaha is the creator of universe for Hindus but you will not find people praying him. They all have their own choice of god Lord Maha Vishnu, Krishna, Siva etc. Hell a lot of them...so you ask who is their H O D? They will tell you the above mentioned guys are all Avatar. Impersonators? Yeah more or less. Almost all of the Hindus worship more than one god, at times dozens of them! This will remind you they are all fans of god. Like your pop or celebrities. It is like me telling you that I am a fan of Merlin Manro, Madonna and of course Paris Hilton…. This paragraph is written only to prove that Hindu gods are creation of wired man .how can you be convinced that a god with elephant head, some of them with wings. One of them was born with birth defect .a man with ten heads? Ravanan. You will find dozens of god's 3 D drawing in their pooja room. None of them can explain origin of their god. What came first? Chicken or egg? Still confused? . Chicken. Charles Chicken! Evolution. Jesus and Allah came as messenger or reincarnation of god .the point to note these messengers of god came only to their respective religion .not the representative of all mighty. His or her owns religion should agree; because the almighty god (if you believe it is certainly not me!) has no religion .now you agree my point?. (3)
Lord Krishna & Co existed only in mythology. There is no proof to show whether they were all alive or dead! Unlike other religious god (messenger of god) there is no proof to show the evidence of Hindu god. If there were any scientific evidence then we would have studied in our history. Oldest temple in India is not more than two and half thousand years old. When other part of the world there are more than five thousand years old temples or places of worship. Maya civilization is ten thousand years old they have temples even in those periods. You may wonder why I made all these silly explanation? I only want to prove my point that the god, religion, cast; creed and superstition are man's invention.Our history tells us our past, present and even future problems will remain rooted in any of these man made S***. I would say the day people are able to think beyond man made god (god based on religion), religion, cast and creed makes the world better place to live in. I will prove people are not happy with their own religion in the following chapter. I will also prove theist themselves agree that beyond religious god. I mean messenger of god there is one and only one ultimate god for all. My question is why not you all pray the creator of universe? They all agree with me that there is only one god with super natural power. Then why not they all worship one god? This is the moot point. I am able to think beyond god and religion, cast and superstition .Can you think like me? Neither god, religion, cast and creed was of no use for me. It had not helped me in my lifetime. Infact based on my cast I had to pay school fees! After reasoning myself at the age of about fourteen I give up praying god. I am not against people worshiping god or practicing their religious rights. I have not touched holly book even with a barge pole still I believe all the religion preaches about love and compassion. Problem is not with religion. Problem is with the preacher; the way they interpret or misinterpret makes hell a lot of difference. As a head of their community they have a moral responsibility to bring communal harmony into the society. My question is why do preachers misinterpret their holly book and preach hatred and incite communal disharmony? Most of the time it was found the root of the problem rest with the way the preacher misinterprets their holly book. Be it Hindu priest, church Father or Mullah. Instead of creating communal harmony some of them are bent on inciting communal disturbances. I only hate such Religious fanatics and religious extremists. We have clear proof for that in Iraq. Even though Shias and Sunnis belong to Islam they can not tolerate each other. Their sectarian violence read civil war or ethnic cleaning is based on cast and creed. Our past, present and even future problems will remain rooted and based on religion, cast and creed system. I would say the day people are able to think beyond god (god based on religion )**************
http://www.lulu.com/browse/search.php?_shopSearch=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lulu.com%2Fbrowse%2Fsearch.php&_helpSearch=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lulu.com%2Fhelp%2Fsearch.php&_forumSearch=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lulu.com%2Fforums%2Fsearch.php%3Fmode%3Dresults&search_forum=-1&search_cat=2&show_results=topics&return_chars=200&search_keywords=&keys=&fSearch=jivan+lal&fSearchFamily=0&fSubmitSearch.x=0&fSubmitSearch.y=0





Dear Readers,There are seven parts of this book. Reading one subtitle and making judgement on my book is very unfair. If you are a theist, you will disagree with me on ninety nine percent of the content but you all will agree with me for the need of a new religion. Please find time to read the entire article before giving me a final verdict. Happy reading… Thank you…Author-Jivan.

Paris Hilton. an open letter 4 U....

http/:www.parishiltonblog.org/
Blog. Title PARIS HILTON. AN OPEN LETTERI am an ardent fan of you .you are the modern day Barbie doll. Being rich and famous you may not need money. I have a request for you. You can do charity work like not other person had ever done in the history of mankind! Here is my idea …I want you to make dolls with your resemblance. With all accessories. Like your party dresses and that kind of stuffs. Some of the model of your party dress for your doll and introduce it in the market .the revenue generated by the sales can be send it to your favorite charity organization .you will be doing a great help for the poor and needy people. You know how to make your more money out of sales? I request you to make your life size doll for play boys (Men)! It can generate more money than you can ever imagine. (Sleeping with your life-size doll can bring peace of mind!) JOKE . Hope you will think about it and will do charity for the mankind.With love,jivan.
N.B. This letter is exclusively written for Paris Hilton ,dated on 14-4-06. so far i am not able to get in touch with Paris Hilton. i hope some other day Paris Will read my letter and do charity work .
There are rich and filthy rich people in this world ; not every body is doing charity work .some of the celebrities are doing Charity work only for Their publicity .
"To help someone you need a Willing heart " .jivan.

AJAY-THE NEW PRIME MINISTER. (Political Thriller)

AJAY The new prime minister. (Political thriller) Author- Jivan. Story line.This story is an imagination of my work. Any person living or dead is purely coincidence. Story is about a young man who was brought up with gandhiyan philosophy. Years later when he became youngest Prime Minister of India, at times he fond gandhiyan philosophy doesn't work in favor of his country. How he tackles such complex problems like cross boarder terrorism, terrorism and communism within India. How he track down his fathers killer in our neighboring country. He even recreates Kargil part -2 for his diabolic plans. Actions take places at Chennai, Delhi, Karachi, Across the LOC and a terrorist camps in Pakistan are some of the highlights. His ability to bring peace and harmony in his motherland also explained.
My father had dedicated his whole life for the service of the poor people .he was not interested in getting married. His aged parents and the local community he served forced him for marriage .at last he got married at the age of forty. I was the only result of their married life .we lived in village near by Chennai city .we had few acres of farmland .our small family was comfortable living out of our farmland. My father helped villagers with kind and his knowledge mostly about cultivating corps. Some time he helped in solving dispute with warring parties. In our village there were always problems with cast and religion .my father was down to earth person. Villagers gave him respect and valued his advises regardless of religion, cast or creed. He was a man of wisdom .he followed and preached two-ideology .one is Sree Narayarayan guru's way of life. One god. One religion for all mankind. He also believed in gandhiyan principles. Non violence and peace for all.
My parents were very affectionate towards me. At night my parents slept either side of me. My father told me bedtime stories form his memory. Ramayanam, Mahabharatham, Baghavath geetha, lord harish chandra, Lord Buddha. All the stories ended with Moral. At end of the story he would ask me about the moral of the story, so I had to listen carefully and answer him. If I did not get it right he would tell me the moral of story. When at times I fall asleep, .he will not disturb me, he will repeat me the same story next day. Later stage he told me about our freedom fighters like Rani laxmi bai, Bhagkth singh, Subbash chandra bose and Mahatma Gandhi. Later in my school days it helped me to score more marks in history. My father was also very much interested in science and technology. He used some of his knowledge to cultivate corps .it helped villages to save water and their corps.
Our villagers insist that my farther contest for the post of MLA but he was not interested in entering into politics. He only wants to help his villages with whatever way he can do within his limitations. Our villager wants proper electricity and better road conditions. They also want some of their problems to be solved through their representative. They found my father was the only qualified and ideal man for that .he was a graduate. At last my father agreed to contest .he was elected unopposed for the post of MLA. In those days there were no corruption (bribe system). Still some of the landlords tried to influence my father with money. Nothing can ever influence him He had always turned down such offers. To solve some of the problem he held meeting with warring parities and settled the dispute amicably. I think the result was his ability to negotiate successfully. That earned him good will of both warring parties. His judgements and anatical skill never went wrong.. He will always work on what is good for the villagers (public) and not for the individuals.
When I was a small boy I mixed freely with local boys .I had my share of fun with them. Like swimming in the pond or enjoyed paying football on a rainy day.

(1)
some time we children goes to some one's farm to pluck mango or pomegranate, even though these fruits are available in our own garden. Just because my father was the head of the village committee most of the time I was let off. Other boys got sever thrashing from both sides. Later my father came to know about my misadventure and I was severely warned by him. He asked me to concentrate on studies and cut down on companies of bad boys. He told me he was keeping all hopes on me .he want me to became a good citizen and serve like him for our villagers, for that he wants me to study post graduation when I grow up.
Our house was like an open government office. Villagers came to our house almost round the clock with their problem .my father was always willing to help them. They always brought me parry's chocolates or some them brought fruits from their garden. They all pampered me a lot.
One of my cousin sisters came and stayed in our house .she studied near by school. . After she completed her fifth standard in her remote village there were no school for her to study further. My father spends money for her studies. She was five years elder to me, she helped me to do my home works. We were not great friends. After all she is a girl. I like the company of my friends. There is lot of fun and adventure with my age of boys.
One day I took her science textbook when I was studying in my seventh standard. She was doing her graduation course in botany as main subject at the time. For a seventh standard student botany was only a part of general science. . In her textbook there was too much in details when comparing to my textbook. She helped me in studying botany subject. I was able to score more marks. . My science teacher was very much impressed with my knowledge in botany. She allowed me to take botany class. One day I took my sister's textbook and went to school .I had drawn the figure of a leaf and want on to explain in minute details; more than what our text book had permitted. My teacher and classmate were very much impressed with my explanations. My sister complained it to my father that she missed her textbook. She went to her friends' house to study botany subject. At home my father was waiting for me. He asked me whether I had taken my cousin' textbook. I said "No. I had not taken ". He checked my school bag and found her textbook inside the bag. I told a simple lie. But he got very angry. I had never seen him get angry with me like that before. He always warned me .He took out his thick leather belt and started beating me severely, my mother tried to stop him but she also got some beatings. As my father went on beating me he asked me."Why did you tell lies to me "? I said a simple lie .no harm was done .I don't know why he went on beating me like that. Like any other boy at the age of thirteen I did not run away from the scene. Physical pain I can always bear it, if I am emotionally hurt it stays with me for a lifetime. After some time he finished beating me. As walked towards the kitchen he told me " you might forget the beating…" I looked down on my legs. Below the shorts there were thick red stripes all over my legs. It gave me burning sensation and the pain was unbearable. I did not cry .he came back from the kitchen with a big hot stainless steel spoon. He stretched out my right arm and paced it on my forearm. " for ever you will remember this." after that I found there was a swearing ceremony. I had to hold my parent's feet and promise that never in my life time I will tell lies…. I did just what I was asked to do and how I was asked to do … the burnt skin mark was there for very long years. Now it is no more visible.but it left a deep wound in my young heart .my mother cried for me…
I went and sat under the big mango tree and started thinking. …"What if I run away from home.".? Some time I ask my mother for money to eat at hotel. Some special sweets that we do not make it at home. Some times she gave me fifty paisa or one rupee. When I sit and eat at the hotel I had noticed small children working for hotel. About eight or ten years old working for twelve or sixteen hours just for food. They are supposed to be studying…. I was not sure whether they do all the hotel work like cleaning table, moping and washing of dishes all because of poverty or because they choose to just ran away form home. Such children have no other option left .I think either it is because of their fate (poverty) or because they chose their fate. (They decided to run away from their home).
(2)
I imagined me in that poor boy…. My conscience told me that I will became one among them if I run away from home. Just for food working fourteen to sixteen hours per day. At home I have food .my father is spending money for my studies; all I had to do is to obey my father and study well to come up in the life…. I had decided not to run away from my home…
Even when I was studying seventh standard I used to sleep between my parents. That day I tried to sleep separately. My father asked me to sleep next to him. I thought not to antagonize him any more .I went and slept my same place .he then started preaching me…. He told me that lord Harish Chandra never told lies in his lifetime. He will even give his head for telling truth! Father continuded "even if you tell hundred lies; you can not make one wrong thing into right. You will end up telling more lies than truth. . When you tell truth. Your conscience is clear…. Tell the truth and face the World! …. He did not repent but he asked me whether it hurts me or not (may be he wants to make sure.) .I told him
" No; but I will remember it for the rest of my life ". He taught me one simple lesson in his own way .He might have been a content man. In the dark I could not see his face. (Later in my life I found it difficult; at times impossible to prove others that I am telling truth. When you can not prove that you are telling truth; people don't trust you any more. Now when some one tells you lie by swearing it you will think he/she is telling truth! . You do not suspect him / her. Only to find some other day he had lied to you. If the person happen to be known to you it hurts your feelings but not his feelings.times have changed. But I still do not tell lies.) I did not go to school for two days. With the stripes marks on my legs Children at school will make fun of me.
After my father became MLA there were visible development in our village .we had new street lights and better road conditions .my father had not change with his new post .he was still helping his villagers .a small government hospital was opened in our villages. Previously villages had to go all the way to Chennai City for treatment.
After completing my seventh standard my father got me admission in a prestigious school at Chennai. in those days It was a one long journey from our village. . I enjoyed going to the new school. Comparing to our village school, standard of education was very high. I had new friend at school. Some of the kids were from rich family. Even though I was good at sports and studies. I was influenced by those kids. Some of them took to L S D, ganja and other boys we having affair with boys! Homosexuality and some went to prostitutes! Hardly fourteen or fifteen years old boys. They want to prove that they are young studs! . Most of them started smoking in the after noon lunch time. At times they went to bathroom in class hours to have few puffs. I was not into any of these things. In those days it was fashionable for young boys to imitate our notional hero or villain form Hindi movies. I tried my best to avoid them but due to peer pressure I had tried few puffs. Only few puffs and I was longing for smoke. Carving for smocking was tooo much. I was worried that I will became addicted to cigarette smoking .I was scared. Most of the days somebody will bring foreign brand cigarettes. Rothmans, Dunhill or Marlboro Packets. They all shared it. I saved one cigarette for the next day. (Sunday). After lighting the cigarette from the kitchen I went to toilet to smoke. Toilet was away from our house, about twenty feet. That was how it was constructed in olden days .my cousin sister got the scent of the cigarette. When I came back she told me I smelled cigarette .she asked me to blow the air. Which I did."You are only studying eighth standard, now itself you started smoking…I will tell your father…" I begged her not to tell my father .I had promised her that I will never smoke. When my father came back she told my father that I had smoked cigerettee.he had meted out the same treatment .he treated me passionately. Treatment ended with same swearing ceremony. Only I had to change few words. This time it ended some thing like this." that I will never smoke in my life time…." I had realized my mistake .I should not have smoked at a young age. (Later in my life I was addicted to cigarette smoking but that incident had noting to do with me).
(3)
Later at night when I was sleeping next to my father he told me some thing that would have made an impact on any budding smoker. My father's eldest brother was a farmer. They had their own land .he used to smoke Beedies. (Poor man's cigarettes) later stage he had troth cancer .his wife used to feed him liquid diet with funnel! Other wise food will come out through the hole in the troth. After seeing this, my grand dad had asked my father to promise not to smoke in his lifetime. My father had promised him and he kept his promise till his death. My father had no other bad habit .No drinks; no smoking; no womanizing; no pan; no beetle nut or gambling habits. The other two other things I admired about my father were; he never took bribe; he always fought for justice and he always told truth. May be not all the truth.
In later years my father became MP of the ruling party. He was an able do-good thing for his villagers. Even in Delhi his ruling party valued his ideology. Regardless of north or south they all respected him because of his age and the service he had rendered to the party and publics at large .his true gandhiyan sprit brought ' separatist' (dissidents) elements under his control. Because of his effort ruling party became on of the formidable force in the political India.
After completing my senior secondary high school education my father asked me what I want to become in the future. I told him…
I…."Dad you are my role model. I too want to serve the public. I will study political science."
Dad…" In the olden days people entered into politics to dedicate their life for serving country men.now it is power politics.it is not good for you my dear son. "He had advised me .he continued 'the day I had to compromise on my ideology and principles I will quit my post. Being an M P. I can do good things for our people; that is the only reason I am here…our young Prime Minister is doing good things for the country. He even consulted me on certain issue .he respect my opinions. We discussed about Kashmir issue, terrorism; Sri Lanka's ethnic strife…" I had interrupted my father.
I." Dad if it is power politics then I want to study Political science."
Dad…." Ajay .it has nothing to do with political science. It is money and power that runs the system."
I…" I thought political science will teach me how to run the country…" I was bit confused .I thought it will help me to learn how the political system works. Here it seems political science has nothing to do with political system. Dad .I want you to do more good things for the public with our portfolio. I want to protect you from terrorist. I want to become a commando and server for you."
Dad…." You better study C.A or something like that and settle down in your life. To me serving for the public is a way of life. You grand father too helped people in the villages. "
I…." Ok Dad. I will study Political science for my graduation certificate. I will try to join commando force. I feel it is my duty to protect you …days by day new terrorist groups are forming. Your security is my primary concern.'
Dad…." Don't worry about me. I have security cover for me."
At last my father agreed to me to join Political science for my graduation. A suicide bomber from Sri lankan separatist in chennai.suburb killed our young prim minister. The vedio clipping was repeatedly shown over the national net work. I was worried about my father's safety. Young prime minister's wife was asked to became prime minister of India but she was not interested to become prime minister .she was more concerned about the safety of her children. Since she turned down the Prime Minister's post who will became Prime Minister of India? this question was in every body 's mind. There was lot of horse-trading and pressure to succeed our late Prime Minister. After Madam had turned down Prime Minister's post, finding a future Prime Minister became a problem. Our late Prime Minister's wife (she was known as Madam in political circle) became executive chairman of national ruling party. She wields enormous amount of power in the ruling party. In fact she was known as remote control of the party. Every final decision was taken with her approval. Madam found Mr. Mahadevan was only person suitable for the post.
(4)
Madam issued whip to all ministers to elect my father for the post of P.M. All of them fell on the line and my father was elected unopposed .my father was a true gandhiyan acceptable for all party works, even opposition parties could not find a single fault with him .I had watched him taking oath of secrecy with my aged mother.
After completing my graduation in political science, I had enrolled myself at Chennai officer training academy to become future commode. Training was very tough. My mother moved to official Prime Minister's residence at New Delhi. After my father became P.M he became very busy man. To talk to him i had to relay on Internet chat late at night .it was mostly about present political scenario and the threat of terrorist. Dad told me about opportunistic politic. Like having strange bedfellows and living with enemy. Regional parties and Allies for the survival of party.
After completing my officer-training course I was eagerly waiting to provide my service as commando man to my father. At last I got a chance to provide security for Madam but not for my father. I had asked my Dad to transfer me to his commando force. He sends me E- mail saying that he will not abuse his power to get me transferred. . He also told me that I am doing a great job for Madam. With out Madam my father would still be one among the M.P. .In the initial stage I was just one among her "Z " plus security man..
Sunday was my off day .my Dad asked me to have lunch with him .we had family lunch after a long time .at home elaborated lunch arrangements were going on in the kitchen .my mother was helping cook to prepare ethnic food. I thought Dad might have invited special guests for lunch. Father and myself were discussing about common problem faced by our country. Because of our ideological differences later turn out to be heated debate. In fact I was expressing some of my views on our past political mistakes and present day situations with my limited knowledge. There was a surprise visitor to our home. Madam! Dad had invited her for a casual lunch.
While we were talking Madam came to our visiting room. I was taken by surprise. I got up and wished Madam. My Dad introduced me to Madam .she knew me as her commando. But not as P M.'s son.
Madam…." I know him .he is an officer and a gentleman. You two were busy discussing something?"
I…" No. Ma'am. Nothing serious. We are discussing some political issues. Some Past and present political scenario."
Madam…" Interesting …I know your Dad .a true gandhiyan. You being too young, you must be having some radical views on our country…" Madam smiled at me and added." may be like every young person you too wanted to change the fate of our mother land."
Dad…" well Madam. We had just started. Why don't you join in our conversations…"
Madam…" well I would like to listen his views…. I would rather sit and listen instead of disturbing his thoughts. Well go on..."
I thought this is my chance to present my way of handling situating in India. Madam is interested in listening my views .Dad was talking to me Kashmir problems he continued where he had left off.
Dad…."We can not give autonomous region status for Kashmir. Majority people are in favor of annexing it to POK. Excessive force will bring U.N intervention. We need to avoid it at any cost. Once U.N is involved; election will be held. There is fear even in opposition parities that at a later stage Kashmir's will annex their state to POK. If Majority people's mandate is that then we Indian can not do nothing. Even though Pakistan had been trying to internationalize Kashmieri issue. We had been pussy footing it for so long. It is a vexed issue. All our previous Prime ministers failed to resolve the problem amicably…."
I…" yes .Dad. I agree.they had all committed blunders. After we became independent. We should have sent the army to recapture the Kashmir (POK). There our first Prime Minister failed to do his duty. Of course I know he had other problems after the partition of India. Subsequent communal riot took away his attention from Kashmir issue.
(5)
What about those Prime Minister who did nothing for the country?. With the first war with war with Pakistan we should have laid down conditions for Pakistan to keep away from Kashmir problem. . We had lost two golden opportunities to claim POK. . Our history tells us that when Pakistan initiated war on 1971 for East Pakistan .our army surrounded their capital Ravelpendi. At least at that time we were in a strong position to bargain for POK. We talk about gandhiyan philosophy. Our country is going pieces….."
Dad…" we in India follows democratic system .not a dictator ship. You understand that first."
I…" when American want to war in Vietnam. Did they follow democratic values?"
Dad…" they have Presidential systems working for them. It is like one-man show. Not only their president rule their country but also other part of the world with his iron fist. That is not possible with our democratic setup. ."
I…." Dad then makes way for presidential system. Where one man can break or make the country."
Dad…" it is easier said than done. It is not possible to bring presidential rule in India.here politician will not allow it."
I find it difficult to argue with my Dad .I need to study more about Indian political system .I then changed topic.
I…." Why was that POTA system removed? Only to give free hand to terrorists and anti nationals to strike back again?"
Dad…."These POTA rules are misused in some states to settle the personnel political scores on opposition parties. They were dead against it .it was with drawn by our previous government. I am planning to replace it with another set of rules .i am also planing to implement a new anti terrorist and disruptive act. To prevent terrorist striking across our country. "
I…" we are very lenient when punishment is meted out to terrorists. Why terrorist can not be awarded with death sentences when it is proved beyond doubts in court?. All terrorist attacks are aimed at creating communal disturbance in sensitive areas across India .All the terrorist attacks are meticulously planned and executed. In my opinion death sentence will act like a deterrent against terrorism. "
Dad…" there is human right organization not just in India but all over the world. We are answerable to them…."
I…." We Indians get it all wrong .in India, human right organization supports terrorist .it always biased. Human life is more precious than a terrorist life. Dad, When it comes to the safety and security of our people and motherland every thing comes secondary. Terrorists are by product of a sick society. They kill innocent people and Instigating communal violence in sensitive area .At times it was felt across Indian states. Do you think terrorists deserve sympathy for their act? Do we need such people to reform and bring back to main stream? There is no place for terrorist in a civilized society. They don't deserve a second life."

Dad…." No. Ajay. Err is human. We should give a chance to reform them. We do not know what drove him to the extremes…."
I…." Dad. We have more than forty-three percent living below the poverty line. Even after fifty-eight years of independence not all these people chose violence a way of life for their survival. It is because we do not have a strong policy and political wills to boot out terrorists from our county. Terrorists are always striking at soft target. Except India all other democratic country takes stringent action against terrorists. Dad .do you think a foreign country will support terrorist regardless of religion or cast?"
Even in twenty first century only in India we have nexalites and terrorist of different religion…is this happing any where else in the world?. Can they try it under a dictator, king or even in a communist country?"
My father had no immediate answer for me. He smiles and approves me to continued .he want to know what was on my mind. May be I representing young generation. I did not wait for his answer…. I wanted to only ask him questions.so I changed the topic again.
I…" our foreign policy is no more a non-alignment policy. We had tilted towards U.S. that is not good for multi ethnic and multi culture country like India.
(6)
Rapid progress in economic growth and industrialization is O.k., I am against people blindly aping western culture. We need roots to grow. We need our past to build strong future.this western culture brings more problems than it can solve. Like drinks; drugs, sex (promiscuity) and violence in younger generation. You know Dad it is estimated at any given time there are more than half a million people behind the bars in U.S alone. ? . Ask them they will have ready-made answer for that. Drinks, drugs or some thing that induce violence or may be even under impulse!. Do we need that kind of society? . Why should we pay hard-earned taxpayers money to feed people behind the bars? We better use it for a common cause.. ."
My dad seems making observation about me .I had never got a chance to talk to him after he became P.M. I want him to see what best he can do any of my questions .I had not given any suggestion yet. Keeping his silent made me ask more questions. Which I want him to find answer.
I…"Dad…" why is that Narmada agitation can not be solved "?
Dad." Well you have asked a good question. I would like to hear your suggestions for that problem."
I had asked my Dad a good question now he expect me to answer for that .I had to think doubly fast because Madam .she was sitting quietly and listing to our conversation with out making comment or judgements. May be she must be judging my views.
I…" our Government had committed a grave mistake without a proper rehabitaion planing for the effected people. . By further raising its height it was estimated more than one hundred twenty-five villages will be effected. Development is important but it is also equally important that the effected people are properly rehabilitated. My suggestion is that to identify the area where further raising the dam height will effect people. Get their details like ration card; votes I.D. their property worth, and their agriculture land details. Once every thing is documented no more further claim should be entertained .A suitable model village down the dam must be built to accommodate those people. With all basic infrastructures like electricity. Road etc. equal amount of land should be given for those who had cultivating farm land. For those who had property government should pay cash .in a remote village it doesn't cost much of money for property. Certain amount of the money from the central assistance and rest of the amount from state government. I think this is simple solution for that mighty problem. ". Madam smiled and approved me with her simple nod.
Dad…." For that a special committee needs to be foamed to take assessment of cost involved and relocating of villagers. I will think about it and study your proposal. ".
Like a common man I always wanted to ask certain questions. But we never get a right person to answer the some of out national issues. I think my father is the most suited person to answer me all my doubts with his new post.
I…" Dad. This reservation system for admission in professional collages needs to be changed. People had been telling to replace Religion and cast with economic criteria. I wonder why no body had taken action about it."
Dad…." This is the one I will be working to implement it." Dad looked at Madam for approval.
Madam…"Yes. Mr.. P.M. it is a long pending issue.we need to sort out this issue."
My mother came and invited us for lunch. It was just four of us at the table. Madam asked me few questions.
Madam…" tell me Ajay some thing about you…'"
I…" After I finished my graduation in political science .I had competed my officer training course. Then I joined as a commando to protect VVIP".
Madam…" you chose two entirely different subjects. Why is that "?
Dad…" He became commando only to protect me from terrorist attack! I told him Madam deserves the best protection because with out Madam there is not National party in India. You are the one who keeps warring factions and dissidents under one umbrella."
(7)
Madam…." So. Ajay you are interested in politics."
I…" Not relay Madam. Like any other concerned citizen of India I too have my own opinion on each and every issue. That's all."
Madam…" Mr.P.M. I think your son deserve a better posting. …" Madam did not complete her sentences. We all looked at her. she continuded. " I want your son. Ajay to be my personnel body guard."
Dad…" that is fine. Infect you can count on him. That is the way I had brought him up."
I felt great. I will get a chance to interact with Madam in near future. She is the only one person to issue whip in the national party. May be that will come handy some other day. We had our lunch with Madam .she thanked my mother for making ethnic food especially for her. Which she relished eating.
In three days time I was appointed as Madam's personnel bodyguard. Other then going to party office she hardy moved around. Unless to visit people effected by natural calamity or to campaign in other state for her party in election time. I think she was a bit media shy person. The only open secret about her is that she is the remote control of National party.
My father first term, as prime Minster was a moderate success. If I were the prime minister .I would have made a sea of changes. When our country made rapid progress in technology and industrial developments why the benefit is not reached to a common man? . Only millionaires became billionaires. Common man is still struggling to meet both ends. I think I should have studied economic to understand why not the country's progress and growth tricked down to common man?
Second term for my father was around the corner. National party was working hard to retain their hold over the country. My father, Madam and their party workers were working over time to boost their achievement over the past years. Party campaign schedule was hetric .I had to move around with Madam in and around north India. In south India my father was concentrating his election Campaign fir the ruling party. I felt safety for my father. It was like his hometown. Comparing to the last time the
Threat of terrorist attack was very high. Security was beefed up. Most of the day we received death threats. Madam and my father came under Z category .it is not easy to penetrate through the high security net. Suicide squad of terrorist gang is the most dreaded by all security personnel.
We covered most of the north Indian sates with out much security problems. Five more day to wind up election campaign. Madam was campaigning near the suburban area of north Delhi. Front of the row was filled with Camera, press photographers and an array of TV crews. Meeting went beyond the schedule time. Party workers kept us busy .it was getting late. At about 7.pm..After addressing public meeting madam started receiving garlands from the public. Madam tried to get down from the dais. I had told Madam by receiving people on the dais would slow down stampede and security personnel will not be put to hard ship. My idea was to keep better surveillance. With too many people milling around her make it impossible to react immediately. Madam after a thought agreed to receive peoples on the stage. Queue was formed. People stood in the Queue to get closer to her. I was standing right behind her and watching reaction of people. Most of them were over excited. In front of madam two black commodes and behind me two more of them. Public had at climb five steps to come onto the dais to meet her.
Most of them carrying garland some with written document. May be those letters containing their personal grievances.. I had noticed a woman with some flower and a letter in her hand .she was waiting in the Que and was wearing burka dress. But her face was not covered with her veil. She must be around twenty-four or so .At the bottom of the dais she stood in the Que along with others.. Weather was fine. But she looks bit nerve. In this cool weather she was sweating .she wiped her face with handkerchief. I kept watching her .she avoided my eye contact.

(8)
My intuition told me that there was something wrong with her. She was eleventh person from Madam. I want to check her again. But I was not allowed to check a woman. Even after wiping her face with hand kerchief sweating was sweeping behind her ear lob . I yelled at lady security officer." move that burka clad woman out of the Que." security woman move closer to her to Wisk her way.she (suicide bomber) reached her hand for abdomen… from behind I pulled hard Madam over me…. Security woman took the full blast…. She was blowup into pieces. We both hit the dais …dais collapsed due to the impact of the bomb. I held Madam tightly by her waist. ."Madam, don't get up…"I pulled our my service revolver.we heard two more suicide bomber went up in smoke in different part of the crowed. Burnt smell of flesh and RDX.lingered in the air. We were not hurt because of security women and the dais. After waiting for few more minutes I had accompnied madam to her car and we reached her residence.
******************Rest of the story explains how AJAY became youngest Prime Minister of India .How he Handles some of the most complex problems like terrorism in Indian and also from cross border terrorism. how he track down his fathers killer in our neighboring country. He even recreates Kargil part -2 for his diabolic plans. Actions take places at Chennai, Delhi, Karachi, Across the LOC and a terrorist camps in Pakistan are some of the high lights.*********************************
http://www.lulu.com/browse/search.php?_shopSearch=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lulu.com%2Fbrowse%2Fsearch.php&_helpSearch=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lulu.com%2Fhelp%2Fsearch.php&_forumSearch=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lulu.com%2Fforums%2Fsearch.php%3Fmode%3Dresults&search_forum=-1&search_cat=2&show_results=topics&return_chars=200&search_keywords=&keys=&fSearch=jivan+lal&fSearchFamily=0&fSubmitSearch.x=0&fSubmitSearch.y=0




In fact it was already over. Only few other place small skirmishes were taking place all along the LOC… We had surrendered tiger hill and captured every body involved in the misadventure … only hand full of army men rest of them jihads and different group of terrorist organizations…my expectation went wrong. Major did not bit the dust. He turned out to be a smart Major …now he will claim they (those army men captured by us) men are disgruntled army men! He never acknowledged terrorists Publicly. So he will wash off his hand. U.S.envoy went to Pakistan to pacify Major …I had competed my task.still I could not expose Major's double-dealings in front of international community.
I am still willing to shake hand with him provided he close all terrorist camps along the LOC. And sign extradition treaty.opening boarders with India for business and people to people interaction. This will help to remove suspicion and bring people from both countries together. I confident that the day Pakistani government give up supporting Kashmir terrorist will bring peace in our region….
(Terrorists are supported in the name of Kashmieri freedom fighters). Gradually people from both countries will isolate terrorists and terrorism will have a natural death…
. (THE END)

Broken Heart . A Leaf Of Life.... (Facts Not Fiction)

BROKEN HEART. A LEAF OF LIFE. LIFE, FRINEDSHIP, BITTER SWEET MEMORIES, INFATUATION, OBESSION, STUPIDITY.You all can laugh at expenses! We moved to our new rented house .All our neighbors were very courteous especially one Anglo Indian family. They had two little lovely daughters .At that time the small one was not studying .her elder sister was studying in L KG. I named the small one. MISSILE! . She was very mischievous and boisterous. At her will she stormed in and out of our house . She will always get it what ever she wants, if not she will break it. Hardly two years old and two feet in height .she wielded enormous power with impunity. Whenever she threatened me with drier consequence I was at her mercy. She usually threatened me by saying that she will break any one of my things or tear any of my favorite books. She announces her arrival by flung opening our main door .the door that slams against the side of the wall tells her temperamental moods. She made sure that we all felt her presence in our house. Whenever she storm out of our house she made sure the main door was’ properly’ closed. Aftermath of the hurricane can be felt all over our house. Missing cartoon or picture in the newspaper, broken items or at times missing object of her desire. Little monster. Between us we had a love hate relationship!. Her elder sister was diagonally opposite to her. She was docile and very obedient. For me She sings nesery rhymes at times she told stories from her books. Some times she asks me to read fairy tail for her. Seven dwarf, Cinderella, Alice in the wonderland...I liked both of them. They helped me to understand their little world. Before I met them I was very allergic to kids. Kids are very stubborn, they cry and make mess around; above all they check my patience.Later in my life it helped me to understand my own little princess.(my only daughter).In India unlike other community people Anglo-Indians are more open. Missile's dad was a hen packed husband .he doted on two of his daughters .her grand mother (nana) was an old respectable lady .she suffered form asthma .her grand pa was a retired army man. Regardless of our age we were good friends. He fought along with British army in Second World War against Japanese in Burma. Inside the elephant grass field his enemy charged at him with his buoyant. He was lucky enough to survive. On his baldheaded he carried the souvenir. Ten-inch deep wounds were visible.In those days I only had black and white T.V .no VCR, that brought me and uncle even closer .to see my favorite Holly Wood or Hindi movies I took video cassette to their house .we watched x rated vedio cassettes when missile's family was away. Age difference? No bar.Missile's mother makes delicious food. When ever she makes any special food she personally brought it our house .my mother always had health problems .B.P, Diabetics, arthritic, ostopedic, depression...she was a great help for my mother.After dinner my parents and their family sit and discuss in our lawn. That was the time my parents were looking for their feature daughter in law. I told my parents that I do not wanted to get married .me and my freedom, no more obligations. That was my slogan. Freedom means everything to me. Selfish? I had never misused my freedom .no drinks, drugs or prostitution. I am a very privet person. That was the way I was brought up by my parents .it was all because of my roots .the fight is not between me and the rest to the world .the fight is within me .I wanted to flyaway (freedom) but my roots are firmly grouted.Missile's mother told me “Jivan. Since you do not believe in religion or cast. Shall I look for a girl for you? Your kind of girl? . She smiled at me .I said a big “ NO. I am enjoying my celibacy life.” she may be bit elder to me .we vibe well. She worked in a privet company as an executive. She was a Leo. She was the boss in her house but with me she was down to earth. She was a loving mother for her little darlings and caring daughter for her aged parents.At that time I worked for Sheraton hotel in Chennai .I knew lot of girls at my work place either as friends or colleagues but this woman was different form all the girls I met so far. One of the reasons could be because I was an introvert. I do not mix with girls besides I suffer form inferiority complex. Other than for official talk I still do not mix with girls.Even though she controlled and manipulated her husband she loves her husband more than anyone else in this world .my friendship with her was not based on love or sex. She had no sex appeal at all. Taller than me. About six feet and weighs tons? May be ninety-eight kilograms or so. FAT. Dark complexion, chubby cheeks with bob cut hair .at home she tie it with elastic rubber band and make it looks like a piggy tail. With heavy curtain maxi she looks parallel and barrel in shape. Posterior? 70 MM ultra Wide. Does she excite you? She took her children to a far a way convent. To catch the bus in the morning rush hours she walks and her two little ones struggled to catch up with her.She remained me of mama duckling. Once I told her “you looks like a mama ducklings” she never took me seriously .she treated me like a kid brother .I did not know the name of our friendship .to me its the persons character and his or her gray matter that attracts and fascinates me. Love thy neighbor? I think because of her good character I was infatuated with her. There were no untoward incidents in our life. Every thing was fine. Until...Before my father's death he had embrace to saint's way of life. (Sanayasam) for the past eight years. Event thought my parents slept in same room. They had separate cot for them. I think my father had intuition about kicking bucket on that particular day. After the news he usually goes to bed by 9.30.p.m. that day he spoke to my mother till 11p.m.later my mother told me that my father had spoken about my marriage and feature .he was more worried about my feature. Just a service technician ...I could not make out a decent life, interested in getting married.... Not being serious about life. He recollected all the major incidents from their married life to till 11p.m. At about 11p.m. he retired to bed. I was fast asleep in the adjacent room .my father felt uneasy pain on his chest. He got out of bed and asked my mother to lay mat on the floor .he reached for lord murugan’s photo to pray. Shooting pain on his chest brought him to floor. My mother’s fanatic calls woke me up .I checked time .it is my habit any time if I woke up in the middle of night I check time it was 1.35 Am. .I rushed to my parent's room. Father was writhing in pain, he was holding on to his chest. I give him hard massage on his chest. (Place your left hand over the chest and bang it with your right fist, massage. repeat the procedures for couple of times. I just can’t do it in front of my frightened mother. If my father did not recover form the stroke my mother will think that I had killed him by banging on his chest .she was shell-shocked .She is an old woman, this type of procedures she will never understand. My father did not respond to me. Suddenly he relaxed his body (Collapsed) . I took thethascope and checked for his heart beat .NIL .it was 1.38 Am. year 1989. I knew every thing was over May be doctor can revive his heartbeat. My mother started wailing. I went and called them. . They all came to our house.We had no phone at home so I took my bike and went to the nearest specialty hospital at about two Kim away and brought the ambulance. Her husband accompanied me to hospital in the ambulance. Her family stayed with my mother. Doctor placed two electrical prods on my father's chest, even after giving electrical pulse charge three times there was no response form my father. Report. Brought dead. We took my father's body back to my home, for us it seems life had come to an end.Funeral … my relatives, workers form my fathers factory, my colleagues and neighbors came to pay their last respect for my father. After consulting with senior relatives by next day at 4p.m we decided to take my father's body for crimination.Now visualize this scene in black and white. Before taking body for crimination, my mother had to pay her last respect to my father. Next to my mother I was standing at my father's feet. My mother knelt down and touched my father's feet and prayed for his soul. …." You are leaving me…. Who is there is to look after me…" my mother started wailing. I helped my mother to get back to her feet. She leaned on my chest."Mom, I will be there for you…I will look after you. ", does this scene appears to you straight out of vintage art movie? Well, I was not prepared to act. It just happened in that way. I so far I had kept my promise. After the" incident". I could not love my mother the same way.After the death of family head we are not suppose to cook food for one week as per our religious coustom.She prepared food for us…three times per day…for a week. Believe me very few people in this world will do it for others.We also had to observe fourteen days mourning as per our coustom. I sat at home and thought about our bleak feature. No more t.v or music. … She told me to watch T.V at her house…. Just to divert my sorrow. Some time I watched t.v with her dad. (Uncle) her kids also help me to lessen my sorrow.We had a common servant for both of us .she was a part time servant for both of us. After about a week of my father's death. Our servant told me "Brother. People are talking about your affair with madam.". I was shocked. Opposite to our colony road there are lane houses. I was concerned about her reputation. This dirty rumor can play havoc in her married life. Who spread this dirty rumor?I swear …I never touched her. I never went to her house when her kids and her parents are away nor we had ever discussed about her married life .we never talked about sex .you ask her.Being an Anglo-indian woman she was very frank. In other communities you do not see married woman with this qualities .She always treated me like a kid brother may be it was my fault ..I was infatuated with Her but I never expressed my feelings for her .I knew she was married woman; she was also great help for my mother. Even at this age of fifty I am still an immature person. I am an aquraian. Inside me there is a boy who refused to grow up (not physically) but mental maturity wise .I know I am imperfect.It was not an infatuation, it was even worst .she became my obsession .she was not my object of desire. It was all because of her good character. That was the first and last time in my life I ever had female friend. I did not wanted to loose my friend at any cost. But every thing went horrible wrong .My friend was Leo .she was a magnanimous person.I got married after ten years to my present wife. Since I am an atheist I do not believe in horoscope but I knew we are not compatible as per zodiac signs .my wife had all the negative characters of a Leo. What a striking contract in same zodiac sign .no wonder our marred life went down the drain. To find out what went wrong between us you need to read my blog in www.jivan.gather.com The Life Of A Little Princess. Life/story.As an aquraian I wanted to know noting but truths. I wanted to know who spread this dirty rumor. The next day I went to her house. Pressed on the calling bell. She opened the main door for me and said "Jivan. Please do not come to our house anymore… your mother told someone that we are having an affair." there were tears in her eyes .she closed door on me. I want back to my home and asked my mother whether she had told some one that I am having affair with her? My mother shouted at me. "Why should I say some thing like that? If someone said some thing like that why do you want to clarify with me "?My mother is an old orthodox woman with a suspicious mentality. I told my mother that we would go to her house and clarify it with her. I did not want these rumor to effect her married life. I had no problems if she does not want to talk to me but this rumor was ridicules.To clear my doubts I tried to talk to her regarding rumor but she and my mother refuse to have a formal (along with her family) talk. Whether I am an aquarium or not I always wanted to know the truth. Nothing but truth. This particular character is in my blood. Since both of them refused to clear my doubts I had no way of knowing the truth. Readers may find it silly. To me it was matter of life or death. Deep inside I was cracking up. I had suffered sever depression … Depression started turning into maniac depression. I was left alone to fend my self… never in my lifetime I felt so lonely and helpless…. I am a privet person .I do not drink nor I went to a prostitute to tell about my broken heart. The emotional turmoil I had suffered was palpable. Imagine. The pressure not to become insane my mother's and my own life depends on me .had I became mentally derailed there was nobody to look after my mother or me. My mother was watching me .she did nothing to help me. I called on my only intimate family friend for the past sixteen years. I said, "look, Venket, there is some miss understanding. …. A rumor. . I need your help. Save me Venket; I am sinking. Together we will sit with her family and clear my doubts. I only wanted to know who spread the rumor .was it my mother? If it was her .she could have told me but why blaming it on my mother? My only family friend I ever had in my lifetime refused to cooperate with me. He said."jivan, It is a family problem ; I do not want to get involved." Eighteen years ago I wrote in my scrabbling pad." to help others one needs a willing heart." .you do not find a willing soul in this materiel world. When you ask some one for help; they either wanted run in the opposite direction if not he or she wanted to know the motivations behind it! Funny people. My elder sister who was married stayed at the other end the city. My sister is eight years elder to me. Unexpectedly after some days my sister come to my house. I told my sister that there was misunderstanding .a rumor. Let's go to her house and sit with her family and clear every thing once for all. My sister told me " to avoid you she must have told you lie! ". Still now my question remains same, " but, why "? I continued 'if she wanted to get rid of me, why she should blame it on my mother"? My sister told me "stop being silly"! . Let's go the psychiatric and get over with it. Take control of your life and look after your mother."We went to one of the chennai's leading physiatrist. He had sympathetic ears because time is money for him .the very same question I had asked doctor."if she wanted to avoid me why she should blame it on my mother? Did my mother spread this rumor? Just because of her suspicious nature?"Doctors are no fools .had he told me " yes ". I will hate my mother for the rest of my life. Doctor prescribed me tempodep, sleeping pills the other medicine I do not know it could be mellaril or largatill .not sure.He asked me to shift our house far away." Even in future if ever you came across with her do not keep grudges with her. Avoid or just be normal". We shifted our house about two kilometers away. They are still staying in their own house. Even though we are just two-kilo meter away we have not met for the past eighteen years. Medicines were wonderful. I tried to recollect events ever since we move next to her house. The more I tried to recollect the more it became hard. There was discontinuity in thoughts. With the help of sleeping pills I slept like a log. I had to continue medicine for five months. Medicine power was gradually reduced and stopped after five months. My memoirs started hunting me again…I was badly in need of break. . I tried for job abroad. Send my mother to my sister's home and left for Oman on two years contract basis for A/C installation work .it was an Indian company, a part from extreme climatically condition work and life was very hard.Even though this chapter in my life took eighteen years ago. I still do not know who played the cruel jock on my life. She or my mother? Life became a comedy of error.You readers can have a hearty laugh at my expense. . Believe me only the person who had a broken heart can understand emotional turmoil. It is no laughing matter for a man or woman who had experienced …Imagine; it was only an infatuation from my side .we both had suffered. She had her family to fall back but I had none.Whether my mother or she played a cruel jock with my life. Perhaps I will never know the truth in my lifetime. Only person who experienced heartbreak knows how difficult it is to get back to normal life. …. To live and enjoy life once again. I am at loss to express my mental agony in words. Looking over my shoulder I still can not laugh at me. Infatuation? Obsession? Or sheer stupidity?This is what I wrote in my scribbling pad. "When you are in love (even if it is one way); you loose your heat. With out heart your brain can not function properly. You are lost forever. Hopelessly…" (should I add shamelessly?).We never met each other over the past eighteen years…less than two kilometer away we lead our own life.Quote from me ". Finding a genuine friend in this material world is one in a million chance. Blessed are those people who found a genuine friend. Preserves it for a life time.
"With love,
Jivan.

http://www.lulu.com/browse/search.php?_shopSearch=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lulu.com%2Fbrowse%2Fsearch.php&_helpSearch=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lulu.com%2Fhelp%2Fsearch.php&_forumSearch=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lulu.com%2Fforums%2Fsearch.php%3Fmode%3Dresults&search_forum=-1&search_cat=2&show_results=topics&return_chars=200&search_keywords=&keys=&fSearch=jivan+lal&fSearchFamily=0&fSubmitSearch.x=0&fSubmitSearch.y=0

ROOTS. - fiction

ROOTS.
fiction
Author- Jivan.
STORY LINE…
A middle class parent brings up their only daughter with lots of love and affection, only to find their dreams shattered at the end. Their only daughter chooses to live with her girl friend as living partner! How her aged parents cope up with their tragedy forms the rest of the story.
********
I was a proud father of my daughter .her every achievements at school made me think of her bright future. Now she had competed her higher secondary studies .I want her to study for C.A .with my influence in a bank as a charted accountant I can get her good job here in Chennai. My daughter Anu insists that she wanted to study for MCA. Even when she was in high schools she was not satisfied with computer software programs .she always complaint to me “it should have been programmed like this...”..You know the way she wants .I mean in her Taurus way. At times she says she want to modify software programs .even though I use computer at my work place It never occurred to me that the computer programs should be modified .here my daughter want to rewrite the programs. I am comfortable the way computer functions. “Who knows? Some other day software will be named after my little genius!”
Being a tarus girl she always got things done it in her own ways .she was very stubborn. At last, I gave in. tried to get her admission at MIT in Chennai. She could not get admission there. At the last moment she got a seat at Coimbatore engineering collage. My wife felt very sad, our only daughter had to study far away in Coimbatore. There was a special bound between my wife and my daughter, there are more like friends. I only convinced my wife “why holding our little genius, her heart belongs to computer engineering. If only she study basics, her innovation can take wings.”...
I took three days off from the bank. We went for shopping to purchase all new items for our daughter, by evening train we left for Coimbatore. Next day she got admitted in her collage. I had paid her fees and hostel charges. We visited our daughter's hostel .she had to share her room with another girl from Mumbai. Her name was Nisha, a very modern and sophisticated looking girl.
Me and my wife stayed near by a lodge for two more days only to make sure that our daughter was comfortable with her stay at hostel .we met our daughter after her collage hours. My daughter complained me about substandard food served at the canteen. We thought it was natural since our daughter was missing her homemade foods.. Nisha came to RLY station to give us sendoff .At the RLY station our daughter started crying. We asked Nisha to take care of our daughter. On the third day we left for Chennai
Without Anu our house was not lively .I had some how managed to carry out my rutine at office but at home i missed my daughter. Now and then our daughter spoke to us over the phone most of the time she complained about canteen food. We really felt sorry for her. With my wife she spoke about Nisha for long time. She said her friend Nisha gave her emotional support... it seems there is some thing common between them. Nisha cannot be a Taurus girl if that was the case they would have locked horns now .may be an Aquarian. I guess. They are not bad people, little bit eccentric, but no harm.

My daughter may not be eating properly I was worried about her canteen food. My ex colleague cashier Ravi was working at Coimbatore branch .I must write to him asking whether he can accommodate my daughter as a paying guest in their house. Just one bathe attached bedroom and homemade food. That was more than enough for her.
(1)
I willing to pay whatever the amount Ravi asks for it .My daughter’s health should not get spoiled. Next day I got our Coimbatore branch office address .I wrote a lengthy letter requesting him to consider paying accommodation for my daughter. After one week I received reply letter. he was more than willing to help me...
Again I had to take leave from office to go to Coimbatore. Next I met collage principle
And explained to him about the paying guest arrangements I made for my daughter.
Ravi had signed papers as a local guardian for my daughter. My daughter settled down at Ravi’s house that was just five-kilometer away form, her collage. Ravi had two children one boy about ten years old and a young daughter aged seven. I gave him one-month advance amount of money for accommodation and food. I promised Ravi that I would send cheque every month for that same amount .I thanked him for his help. Every thing was fine. I was happy no more food problem for my little genius, she can now concentrate on studies. I returned back to Chennai.
Our bank offered voluntary retirement scheme (VRS). .I had five more years of service left to retire but if I opted for VRS I will get extra amount of money with that money I can built first floor and give it for rent .I asked for my wife’s opinion , when it comes to making decision she will always leave it to me but Still I ask my wife's opinion. I had applied for VRS scheme and got extra amount of money; along with my settlement amount in about five months of time. We built two bedrooms with bathe-attached house on the first floor. Just the same as our ground floor. Ground floor we gave it for rent .our tenets were good people. An old retired gazette officer with his wife .two of his daughter were married and settled down in abroad. They never gave us any trouble.
After constructing first floor balance amount of money I had put it in fixed deposit scheme in my wife's name .I had slogged for thirty year for my office. Now all I want is to enjoy the retired life. After my daughter's graduation she should get married and settle down. If her husband permits she can go for work.
The other day my daughter rang up and asked me whether her friend Nisha too can stay with her as paying guest at Ravi’s house .she said Nisha had too problem with canteen food. I told my daughter I would get back to her after I spoke to Ravi .Next day I spoke to Ravi over the phone. I told Ravi that there are some problems with hostel canteen food. The management people are making a killing out of hostel facilities. Collage management was charging heavy rate for substandard food items at canteen. Even after repeatedly complaining about it management had not improved the quality of food. I had asked Ravi whether he could accommodate my daughter’s friend Nisha as a paying guest. .he did not say anything immediately...l continued “ just one extra cot she will stay in my daughter’s room .they are good friends .it will help them to study better by discussing their subject .Don’t bother about preparing north food .Nisha will get used to our food . Idlees, sambar and rasam like stuffs .she can have north Indian foods on Sundays at the fast food restaurant. I do not think she will be a burden for your family. She is from well to do family, If you want you can charge extra amount form her. Think about making extra money for another four years. You talk to your wife and see what best you can help her".
After a week's time I had received letter from Ravi .He wrote to me that he had purchased one colt and bedding for Nisha and she is allowed to move in any time. He also mentioned four rupees he will charge per unit of current consumption. That could be his wife’s idea. I said I will inform my daughter and they will get in touch with you. .Nisha’s parents came from Mumbai and she was shifted to Anu’s room as a paying guests .Nisha’s parents thanked me over the phone .her father assured me that next time he will meet me in person. It seems she too was pestering her father with canteen foods. Nisha send me a big greeting card thanking me for arranging accommodation for her.
(2)
On Christmas vacation Nisha came and stayed with us. There seems a special bound between them just like the sesame kids. They were always together. They spend vacation time watching movie everyday at the theater. Nisha spent lot of money on branded clothes .she bought some clothes for my daughter too. She had great taste and sense of color.
On the final year, one of the leading international software giants called on for innovation ideas in software. . My daughter Anu had submitted her thesis for the contest .she was one among the three students selected by the company. Even before she could write the final examines she was hired for the company’s R&D division at Mumbai. She asked for my permission to join their head quarters .I told her she can sign the contract but only after writing your final exams she can join for work .my daughter's job was assured I felt very proud of her. My wife was apprehensive about sending our daughter far away. I told my wife that she should be proud of her daughter.working in R&D for a world’s leading company is just a dream for any aspiring engineering student. They are offering initial salary of 30 K! If she can prove her mettle one-day she will work for their head quarts at Silicon Valley. Our little genius is no more a girl she can take care of herself ". My wife asked me.”Where will our daughter stay at Mumbai. Will she be safe alone?”. I told my wife not to worry about her accommodation at Mumbai. There is YWCA and there are good women hostels too. After she complete her final exams we will decide about it " .
After three months our daughter wrote her final exams and came home with Nisha. My daughter had only one month left to join for work at Mumbai head quarters of MNC. I deiced to celebrate my daughters appoint order. Booked dinner at Sheraton hotel. On Sunday we had dinner at Sheraton. While having dinner I told Nisha about my wife’s concern for Anu’s stay at Mumbai.
Nisha. “Why worry about your little genius's stay at Mumbai when we have a big bungalow there? IT park is just about seven kilometer from our home .my papa can drop her on his way to his office .I am unemployed. I can drive her for work and back home in my car; provided that I am paid for it!"
I...”Do not worry Nisha once our daughter join for work she will try job for you. What Viji, anymore excuse you want to make? ”
Wife...”Thank you, Nisha .I was really worried about my daughters stay at Mumbai “
Nisha...”Auntie, it is no big deal. After all she is my intimate friend ".
We were very much worried about our daughter's safety. She will have a homely atmosphere at Nisha's place. After a week's stay at our home Nisha left for Mumbai by flight.
We had decided to go to Mumbai three day prior to Anu’s appoiment at her office. We left for Mumbai my train. After thirty hours of journey we arrived at VT station. Having informed Nisha she and her mother were waiting for us at the station. We got into their new car. Her house was a big bungalow .a five-bed room house with a big garden in the heart of the city!. I could not imagine a house with big garden in Mumbai. It must be worth cores of rupees. May be their life style demands opulence. Her father was running export business. They were exporting Precious, semiprecious stones, designer and ethnic jewelry to U.S and Europe. Her elder brother was married and settledown in U.K. he was looking after their family business there. Nisha’s father joined us for lunch .He brought a gift packet for Anu. His way of celebrating my daughter’s appoiment. He told Nisha to take us around the city .after lunch he left for office .time is money .he must be a busy man. After lunch Nisha took us to gateway of India, Nariman point; marine drive and Malabar hills.we enjoyed watching sunset .we had coffee and snacks at Hilton hotel. We then went for shopping at Crawford market and returned back to her home at 8.30 pm.
(3)
Next day Nisha took our daughter to her office in her car. Since we were returning back to Chennai by evening train our daughter came early to home .we all got into the car. Nisha drove us to central RLY station. We asked Nisha to look after our daughter and I left for Chennai with a heavy heart... Some time our daughter spoke to us over the phone .she was all praise for Nisha. Every day Nisha drives her to her office. My daughter said she was trying to get a job for Nisha at their office. I said “Good, some thing in return. “.After two months, Anu was able to get job for Nisha, not in her research department, she said some software development related work.
Every year-end our daughter came and stayed with us. Anu told me that she is doing higher studies in her specialized subject. She said her ultimate goal was to work for the company’s R&D center at their headquarters in Silicon Valley .she had not changed much. Still our same old Anu…. At least we believed....
When she came to our house on her fourth year of her service, .my wife reminded her of getting married. At first Anu told her as if she was married to her work .I mean she was not interested in marriage, commitments and responsibilities. Just like any other over ambitious girl would have talked at her age. There was something wrong….. Something we parents were not prepared for it.….
We gave our daughter more love and affection. Unlike other parents we also gave her more freedom. We were over confident of our daughter. Even when she was a young girl I taught her how to be self-reliant .we tolerated all her tantrums she was our only child. we pampered her every whims and fancies...but then she was not a spoiled child.
On fifth year of her service Anu got promoted to head of their department. She was asked to take incharge of their New Delhi branch .she got her friend Nisha transferred to their new office. They took an apartment at a posh locality and settle down.
I had gone for my usual evening walk. Our daughter Anu had flown from Newdelhi for her official work at Chennai branch. After her office hours, she came to our home in the evening. After serving coffee my wife spoke to her about her marriage.
Viji ...”Anu, it is right time for you get married and settle down in life.”
Anu.. “Ma ... I had recently taken incharge of our new branch at New Delhi. I do not want to get married at this time of my carrier life .I am aiming to work for our head quarters at Silicon Valley.
Viji...”Do not get married to work .you have your own life. Slow down. See whether you can get some work from your company and start something here in Chennai. I will ask your daddy to make arrangements for loan from the bank. Your hetric work schedule will not permit you to look after your children properly. Your daddy insist that we will bring up your children .he is looking for a little companion in his retired life."
Anu...”Ma...Our work schedule is very hectic .you do not understand work pressure and deadlines .I cannot do justice to my married life. Commitments and responsibilities ...sorry ma...Don’t force me for marriage now...”
Viji…" .Anu, don’t tell me all those lame excuses, people are getting married regardless of their work pressure. Shall I ask your daddy to look for a bride groom?”
Anu...”Ma... please tries to understand me ...” (4)
Viji ...”Are you looking for Mr. Right? Anu...There is no Mr. Right and nobody is perfect. Success of married life depends upon the mutual understanding between the husband and wife. it will not happen over night ,married people developed it over a period of time .in married life you follow simple rules like .Do not constantly nag your husband .when he throws tantrum just ignore him .he will come around ,pamper him when he is good .do not have ego hassles with your husband . , Do not try to reform him .men are like grownup kids with age they will became matured, and most import thing even in married life do not encroach onto their territory. They need freedom and breathing Space.. That is all they ask for you...If you follow these simple rules you can enjoy married life .now tell me are you in love with some one? You know your daddy is very broad minded person .he will not be bothered about his son in laws religion, cast, north south or rich or poor. Your happiness means every thing to him ".
Anu was fed up of her mother’s constant nagging .she just flared up.
Anu...” Every time I came home you are pestering me to get married .yes I am in love .I cannot live with out her! . I am not getting married to any other guy “...
Viji... “What nonsense are you talking about? You are in love with HER?. With whom?”
check this link.......
http://www.lulu.com/browse/search.php?_shopSearch=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lulu.com%2Fbrowse%2Fsearch.php&_helpSearch=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lulu.com%2Fhelp%2Fsearch.php&_forumSearch=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lulu.com%2Fforums%2Fsearch.php%3Fmode%3Dresults&search_forum=-1&search_cat=2&show_results=topics&return_chars=200&search_keywords=&keys=&fSearch=Jivan+lal&fSearchFamily=0&fSubmitSearch.x=0&fSubmitSearch.y=0
********Rest of the story explainsabout Anu's life with her girlfriend! How her aged parents cope up with their loss of only daughter. Their life with Mini. Even after the death of Anu's father how her mother brig up Mini takes you through the rest of the pages. ***************************
Before their first wedding anniversary, our daughter Mini derived a healthy boy at the city hospital. On the third day she was discharged from the hospital. They got home by taxi .Mini unlocked our main door. Wife brought my grand son close to my garlanded photo. Pointing her finger at me my wife told my grand son “Look, that is your grand pa.." she wiped her tears… ..
(THE END)

THE LIFE OF A LITTLE PRINCESS. Life/story. (Semi-Fiction)

(LIFE/STORY)
Author-Jivan
THIS STORY IS DEDICATED TO MY DAUGHTER. SONY GUDIYA.
AUTHOR.
Story line
This story is about a little princess. How globalization changed an ordinary family life forever. An-aged fathers struggle to give his only daughter good education and a secured life. After the court battle
For his daughter's custody will he ever live with his estranged wife?

I was enjoying my celibacy life. Living with my ailing mother I had to cook, wash and look after my mother. My mother repeatedly reminds me of get married. One day my mother reminds me that all my friends were married and happily settled down. She asked me. "When are you getting married? After me who is going to look after you "? I answered it by saying, "Ma marriage means more responsibilities and more expenses. I am enjoying my bachelor life, I have my freedom and no more obligations ".

After some days I started thinking about marriage and its prose and cons. After much deliberation I had decided to publish in matrimonial column for a bride. ". 5.5 ft, slim, fairs. Religion and cast no bar, bride for 42-years-old service engineer, c/o National, Chennai 2. I had received sixteen-reply letter. Some of the would be in laws want me to convert into their religion, others offered me money to start my own business and few letters from widows... out of sixteen reply I had selected only three letters and went for bride hunting. One is too fat, one is too short and the other girl rejected me.

My sister in Kerala proposed a girl for me. I had decided this is the last girl I am going to see. No more brides hunting for me .I received one black and white photo. A girl with a pathetic look. Poor soul! My mother approved of her by saying, "since she is also from poor family she will be able to adjust with what ever we have. You get it checked your horoscope and see whether she suits for you.". I took both the horoscopes and done the astrologer check it. Astrologer told me only 10 out of 5 point's matches. As per astrology a minimum of seven points should match for a happily married life. he advised me to look for some other girl. I knew a horoscope does not guarantee successful marriages. Success of any marriage depends on mutual understanding between husband and wife. "Do people in love check their horoscope.?" "Does other part of the world check horoscope before getting married "?. This is the last girl I am going to see, either marriage or no marriage for me. I took the girl's photograph to my office. My colleague told me she is okay for me…She will suit you…" She was tailor made for you! ". My mother and all others approved her so I decided to meet her personally. As per our custom formal meeting between bride and bridegroom was arranged at her home. I went to Calicut to meet her personally. She brought me coffee and sweets. We exchanged very few words .she was very shy but managed to ask me few questions.
Boy meets girl.
Girl: "Do you like me"?
Boy: "Ok".
Girl: "Do you smoke"?
Boy: "Yeah"
Girl: "Will you stop smoking after marriage"?
Boy: "I will try my level best"
Boy: "Do you like me"?
Girl: "Yes. I like you"…..
(1)


After one month our marriage took place at Guruvayur temple in Kerala as per our tradition. As per our marriage ceremony I was asked to pray at the temple. Being an atheist, it was difficult for me to pray, but at last I prayed!. "O god! There should never be any fight between us"! Our first night was spend in crammed second-class compartment of a train… we went on talking till we fell asleep!

There was no money for honeymoon. A new life! At last somebody is there at my disposal! What a great feeling!" Boy. Why did not I get married earlier"? . Life was smooooooth. No more washing clothes, No dishwashing either. forgets about cooking. I wanted to sing." what a feeling…

One of the service engineers working at our Hydrabad branch resigned and left for gulf. My manager gave me transfer letter asking me to join at HYD in two weeks time. I pleaded with him to send one young service engineer who was completing training at our service center in Chennai.. Manger told me that I was promoted as sales com service engineer (without any raise in salary) I had explained to him by telling selling international brand fax and laser printer are something new to me. I also will find it difficult to meet expenditure. All my reasoning fell on his deaf ears. He insists that I join HYD branch without cribbing.
I had worked at HYD branch for six months. Life was tough. A part from attending service calls I also had to sell fax, dot matrix, laser printer, computer monitor, and cordless phones and there was target to meet. I tried my best. I could not make incentive by selling products because it was an international brand and prized above all other brands. Most of the time I end up selling product at end user's prize. Just to show the minimum target.

My mother and wife wrote separate letters to me. Even silly problems were blown out of propositions in pages after pages. Mostly accusing at each other. At home without a referee (me) it was free for all. We men get along easily. If we do not like the other person, we will avoid him at any cost. If the problem persists, we will solve the problem with another problem. It is like " trouble the trouble and there won't be any more trouble". For we men It is just that simple. At home my mother and my wife wanted to bring the roof down!. I thought enough was enough. I will find some job in Chennai. I had submitted my resignation letter after working for six month at HYD branch and returned home without a job.
Even after three years my wife was not conceived. Gynecologist told me that my wife needs test and medication. After spending more than Rs.5000 and waiting for 10 months. My wife delivered a baby girl. I went to see my little princess with new cloths and presented her cute little teddy bear. I saw my little princess. My wife named her Ammini. To me she will be always Sony Gudiya .My wife later wrote to me that my "goody" was scared of teddy bear and used to cry when she was an infant. Gradually she got used to him and they became Inseparable. My wife was taking training at her home. How to bath and look after Sony. After fourth mouth I brought them back to my home. Sony carried teddy wherever she goes. Seldom she gets angry and poor teddy became her victim…he was always at the receiving end, after beating she tells him she doesn't want him around. She then throw him out of the window. My wife or myself go out to pick up the teddy and 'pacify' him .if our daughter is still angry she will came back and beat teddy again, at times she would threaten teddy that she will kill him. Hardly one year and two months old and she want to kill teddy! . When we console our poor teddy, Sony feel sorry for him she then tells him sorry and give him a bear hug and shower him with her kisses.. They soon became inseparable once again.
Watching our daughter grown-up in front of our eyes can not be described in word .I used to compare my intelligence with her age. Comparing to other girls of her age Sony was an intelligent girl. . At the age of two she was able to sing five nursery rhymes, she was able to tell the names of week and months, she could also count one to fifty. I felt very proud of my daughter. Her favorite TV.channel is POGO. I had lots of hope on her…. A Little bit monster but my daughter was full of life and fun.
(2)


At home my mother and wife were trying to show their superiority. Fragile ego problem .I was with out job for one and half months and were drummed by either of them. I met my ex colleagues of Chennai branch. They told me that our manager took bribe of RS 50,000 from the trainee technician to appoint him in Chennai branch .the boy was from his same cast. I knew our Chennai branch manger was a man of dubious character. When working in any organization over a period of time we will understand how the system works but safe guarding our job is most important than ever changing equations and politics in an office environments.
Later our company came to know his involvement in double-dealings and kicked him out of the service. He had misappropriated lacks of rupees by appointing new dealers .he even collaborated with them and made good fortune. Two of the dealers he appointed went absconding along with goods. Company had lost nearly twelve lacks of rupee .Out of three cores of rupees as outstanding amount from our dealers from across India, our manager had alone supplied goods worth more than sixty lakhs of rupees items even after repeatedly receiving bounced cheque from the dealers. Some of the dealers declared bankruptcy! . The other method he used to make money was by taking company's service contract. He runs a parallel service for the costumes with the help of two of the technicians. Out of hundred and sixty-service contracts he had appropriated half of them in his name. Who will bell the cat?. At the age of forty-four I went for job hunting.

A.D.1999... Our union finance minister (present Prime Minister) declared LIBERALISATION policies, another pet name given for Globalization. Every Companies and organizations were offering voluntary retirement scheme (VRS) read load shedding or to contain over head cost .No white goods manufacturing companies were employing new service technician for their service department. They appointed franchise. . Some of them offered work on sub contract biases to get their service done. With no other option left, I had joined in one of the India's leading white goods manufacturing company's franchise as a service technician. It was not bad in the beginning. Only five technicians to attend service calls .At times instead of three pin codes we end up attending four-pin code area per technician. Even at 9.30 p.m. we were on site about forty or fifty kilometer away from our home. Life was tough but we were able to make some extra money.

According to the manufactures whims and fancies and regardless of workers benefits franchise changes rules and system over night. Appointment procedures were made simple by franchise .No more appointments letter. Appointment was made verbally. It goes some thing like this."Do you have your own vehicle?". And a mobile?. you know a Cell is a must ?"..Without bike and cell phone, you are not considered as a service technician. They call it survival kit. Minimum requirements. "Ok, good. "Now you have to pay for uniform dress!". (Only God knows how long he is going to keep you in work.)"From tomorrow onwards you can join for work". After you join for work only he will tell you how to make more money by-achieving target (regardless of working hours). Sooner or latter you yourself will find how much money, time and energy you have to use to extra money.
We never had PF, Gratuity, medical,(ESI) or life insurance ,no vehicle maintains allowance ,petrol or food allowances .only consolidate pay per calls were paid .RS .15 or RS 20 ,depending upon the distance from work place. They paid RS 40 per call if it is in Timbkabtu or in out station. There are some company's franchise and service subcontracts offering Rs10 for attending service calls. Those technicians survive by making "extra" money .how they make extra money and how much they make depends upon their individual "skill".
Manufactures increased number of franchise to six and gradually increased number of technician to 24. (In our franchise) .To give customer immediate response technicians got only one pin code per person. . Per pin code area for one person reduced call attending time and also reduced number of service calls or his lively hood .our manufacture appointed five more franchise. Manufacture insist that we sell accessories to makes extra money to makeup the lost service calls .All the accessories were over prized. (3)


Cheap and duplicate items made in Delhi or some chine's spare parts were asked to sell it to coustmer.
Some of the items are even sold by footpath sellers!. Selling was tough. Since most of accessories were sold along with appliance by the dealers at the time of selling machines. Company offered us some incentives like if we sell these items we get a consolation amount of 50 peanuts .the highest being 100 peanuts. Per person per pin code area, it means number of reduced service calls (cards). Per day average four or five calls. However distance and petrol consumption remains same.
At the end of the day when you calculate petrol, maintenance and other expenses the struggle we family men make out a living was not worth it. With no other job then franchise system available we just continue to work. Lucky guys are those young bachelors at the end of the month they make out about RS 2000 or RS 2500 p.m. we family men find it difficult to meet both ends. Most of the young and energetic technician made fast money. Some of them disappeared with fridge or A/C. some technicians made arrangements to collect repairing charges from different customer in one particular day and took the entire amount about Rs12000 or Rs15000 and vanished. The intelligent one canvassed service contract from the customers and settled down with their own shop. With "inside people" they can all ways get their work done in double quick at the half rate! . In fact those technician give much faster and reliable service. In my five and half years of service at franchisee more than 250 young and energetic technicians were kicked out of service. Hiring and firing was the order of the day.

Target was always set beyond the reach of anyone. Our manufacturing company demands that we generate ten lakhs rupees worth of business per month. Thorough sales service and annul maitaince contract. Our boss was a BP patient. Like a volcano now and then he explodes. He uses foul languages and was a very abusive person. When we point out hardly 120 or 130 per person/ month. How can one generate one lakhs rupees worth of business per month? Our boss for the matter any other boss does not like asking questions .he will yell at us by saying, "you people are giving lame excuses! That is the advantage of being a BOSS. You can also talk through either side of your mouth. We get enough from customers, including manufacturing defect of products, any given time there is more than 4000 customer case pending in consumer court. Shouting back at customer will cost our job and our boss shouts at us for not bring enough revenue for him. Our Boss was under tremendous pressure to show ten lakhs rupees worth of business per month. I was a good technician, when it comes to meeting target I was always above average .it is impossible to meet target every time. If you remember 80 % of the work is done by 20% of the work force then you will understand what I mean. When our boss humiliated me in front of others for not archiving target; I felt that I can forgive my enemy, if ever I wanted to kill some one it must be our boss!. So much pressure at work place. No housewife or a mother will never know what is present day work pressure or how much we technician get abused by manufactures, by our boss and also by coustmer. When it is a question of family survival and keeping the job, we take every thing in our stride.

After the globalization manufactures localized their work. Manufacture goods, spare parts, put cash in their bank and attend consumer case at the court. Period. They now run their office with skeleton staff. Franchise technician's work includes not only servicing their equipment but also to generate as much as money for the manufactures. A Technician becomes all in all. He must be a sales person, capable of selling products or spare parts, collection agent, PRO for the manufactures. His duty also includes.. read warning to make sure that the customer are not going to consumer court at any cost .we were asked to settle the dispute then and there. How you do it is none of the manufactures business! . Their argument is that if it is not a manufacturing defect then the fault lies with the technician! How convenient it is for them to blame on technician. Company executives come to franchise only to preach. It comes naturally to them .how many examples read cock and bull stories they tell us for motivation. Ask any of the company or franchise boss to be in our shoes, they get pissed off. That too for peanuts for per calls. Rest is assured when you got home... God blesses those poor souls!
(4)


On fourth month I brought my little princess and wife from my native place. Sony was very friendly with all our neighbor's .who ever stretched their arms at her she will lean on them and traveled around the place on their hip. My wife complained to me that she could not have enough of her daughter.
When my daughter was almost ten-month-old we tried our best to walk her. She was little bit plum. not able to balance herself. Our neighbor an old woman told us how to make her walk .we tried it on her. I placed my daughter four inches away from the compound wall. My daughter leaned on back and supported her back shoulder on the compound wall and stood there for some time. We were eagerly waited for her first walk. The magic began after some time. By placing her small step side ways she started moving side ways, like a crab!. First she walked towards left side then stopped then towards right. . It was funny watching her walk side ways, all the while supporting her back shoulder by leaning back at the compound wall. She learned to walk very quickly. Our life revolved around our daughter. Wife started spending more and more time with our daughter. Our house routine had changed. My mother and wife started quarreling over silly things. There was always tension at home. I do not know whether to support my mother or my wife. They started accusing at each other. One thing I was sure both of them tell me nothing but lies only. It was only the beginning.
After 3 years
The company were I worked was running at loss. One day our boss called for a meeting and announced, "I am loosing one lakhs fifty thousand Rupees per month. I cannot run the business any longer. Please you all look for another job. I am going to close down my business." I tried disparately for a job for the survival of my family. I sent my Bio - data for job. Apply.. apply.... NO reply! Rejected! Date of birth 14/02/1957. They concluded this man is too old. I had also attended walk in interviews.
Interviewer: "You must have a vehicle and mobile phone; you have to pay for petrol and mobile bill. You see. You are a too old; we are looking for young and energetic person, who is capable of working 10 to 12 hours, that too for RS. 2500 p.m. Will you be able to work for that amount"?.
" I need RS. 3500 p.m. to run my house. I thanked them for not calling me...I went home empty handed.

I started pledging gold for provisions and rent. My wife is too good when it comes to sarcastic way of talking. She also thinks I am an incompetent man to get a job. She can only find fault with me. not realizing that nobody wanted to employ a 48-years-old man nor willing to pay more than 2500 p.m. She started taking me for granted. Instead of realizing that with my meager amount of salary I am unable to run the house. She had no intentions of finding a job to save our family. I had spend about four thousand rupees for her computer course, she had completed her Hindi teaching course. She also knows tailoring work. Because I pledge her gold for house expenses she hated me .her problem with my mother also became unbearable. My house became a living hell. I told her to apply for some job sale girl, typist, data entry and make some Rs.1500 p.m. balance amount I will manage. She does not want to share the responsibility of our family. One day she called her brother and left for her native home with my daughter. Poor little princes. . She was hardly two years and three months old when she was taken away to wife's house.

How many times she must have cried asking papa and nana (My mother). I still wonder what my wife would have told her about her nana and me. I missed carrying my daughter around .We used to goes to the park to play. She also like going to a shopping center where they sell all fancy chines items. I missed every thing about her .My wife was so cruel and selfish. The fact is that she did not want to save our family life .it is her bother and mother who manipulate her .it is her family's responsibility to see that our marriage survive.
In India people use marriage for emotional black mailing. Some even use marriage as meat business. Marriage can makes money. Alimony! I missed my Sony Gudiya very much. Her small talks. Her nursery rhymes, pranks, laughter and her innocent smile…
(5)

Once I remember …I bought a packet of mosquito coil and got a plastic Chinese camera free. I loading film I took a roll full of snaps of my daughter. "Sony Gudiya… smile please…"! Click…click. One day after paying rent I came home and sat on a chair and was thinking how I am going to pay for provision. Which gold bangle should I pledge now? My daughter came to me with the plastic camera in her hand "papa, smile please…!". She Try to take my photo without a film in it. .I had found memories of my daughter… If only I had a job ……..

I had sold my wedding ring to join multi level marketing [MLM]by paying Rs.3000/-. MLM products
Were very costly. Only very few customers purchased MLM products. Here in India people are interested in buy cheap and best products. They do not realize that cheap products can not the best products. They are still stuck with cheap and best!. Most of the customers brought items only on trial basis. Nobody wanted to risk his or her money by joining as consultants. Some of the MLM company had already flopped others cheated on customers. I went to native place to meet my daughter, I missed her for only five months but I could not recognize her .she was looking thin and sad. Poor soul! At this tender age how much mental agony she might have under gone. I had promised her that as soon as papa gets job I would bring her home. The only promise I could not keep up till date. In my native place of Calicut I tried to supply MLM products. I had also tried to recruit new consultant but nobody was interested. Some of the MLM Company had already cheated public. I had lost nearly Rs.5000. Heart broken, I had returned to Chennai. Back to square one.

Back in Chennai, again I went searching for job. Near by my house there was one electrical shop. Whenever customers came and asked for electrical work I went and attended their complaints. Shop owner took 25% commission on my labor charges. My little princes remained a distant dream. I have to look after my ailing mother. My wife and daughter and stayed with her family in her native place. When my daughter completed three and half years, It was time for her join LKG. My wife had send me letter asking for RS 3000 as donation to admit Sony in the near by school. Whatever gold was available at home I had to pledge it at the bank. I had send Rs.3000 as donation. She again sends letter asking for Rs.300 as school fee. I was not able to send her any more money. Here my own survival became a big question mark. I could not meet monthly expenses of RS 2500. Instead of she tried to get a small job just to pay her daughter school fee. She started sending me sarcastic, abusive and threatening letter. She wrote to me.. "If my family had to bare mine and your daughter's food and education expenses. Why did you get married? I do not need such an irresponsible husband nor does my daughter need her father.". I had no other option but to call her by phone and fire. "It is more than one and half years now since you left my house with Sony. I had to cook food for my mother, wash cloths and dishes. You only wanted to stay at your home and ask for money. Why should I pay you? Did I agree at the time of marriage that I would send you money if you stay at your home? When I had money and I was managing house you never had any problem. Now that I do not have a proper job you do not need me any more. You only need money. Now listen…. There is no free lunch in this world. Everybody will have to work for his food. If you still do not realize your responsibilities even at the age of 42 not even god can save you. Have you ever given a thought how parents are bringing up their children? You thought it was only a child's play. Since you do not need a husband why are wearing (wedding chain) mangalsutra? Give it to me. I will sell it and recover your gold from bank. Since I have to cook and wash my cloths there is no question of me sending money to you.. I got married so that the least my wife will take care of me. You know you think you are from aristocrat family. You have an ego problem. Even a watchman is running his family with his meager amount of salary of Rs.1000 or 1500 p.m. His wife does some kind of job support their family. I do not know why don't you realize who you are?. How much money can you earn for your family? Be in touch with reality. Come down to earth. Do not write abusive or threatening letters to me. If you do not want me, get divorce. That is fine by me... I need my child. I will not be able to give my daughter a secured life and good education. I want to put her for adoption. I have no other choice. Period."
(6)

I had disconnected the line. No more letters, No more phone calls from either side. I still think of my little princes. When will I see her? What will I say if she asks me "papa why are you not taking me to your home"? The thought its self was nothing but a nightmare. I lost sleep and started smoking too much. I even lost interest in life… I thought of giving up my daughter for adoption, so that she can have a secured life and decent education. The least I will be able to meet my daughter now and then. I do not want my daughter to grow up like her mother. My wife says nothing but lies, talk like an opportunist, riddled with sarcasm and above all she is an egomaniac. She was impossible
************************************
One bad morning her brother and two of her uncles turned up at my house. They wanted to know my intentions! . They questioned me "You are not taking your family responsibilities, what are your intentions…..? I had answered it by saying that I had no intentions. "If she can live with me with whatever money I earn. If she wants to stay in her house and expecting me to send her money, then I am not going to send any money to her. At the time of marriage did I signed any agreement that I will send her money even if she stays in her house? More then two years ago she left for her home with my daughter. Is she bothered how I am living here? Instead of telling, her to find some work and manages life with me, you people seem interested only in money. I am not going to pay single paisa. Do what you want. Do you want me to sign divorce paper? I will sign, but do not expect me to pay alimony. That will never happen. I am determined. Now you all can leave my place". They left me by saying that I will face legal action.
I started thinking… this is a classic case of making marriage as a meat business. Get married, have children, find fault with husband, fight over silly things with mother in law, file divorce, take alimony and live with the way she and her family wants. This is not going to happen with me. I am going to put a stop for this.
After a couple of days I had received court notice asking me to attend. As the D-day approaches, I started preparing for the test of my life. I will fight it out with tooth and nail. I need my daughter at any cost. I knew." yes "she will ask for her gold ornaments. Including interest it is Rs.25, 000.there is only one-way to recover her gold. That is by selling my mothers wedding chain. Ever since my father died it was lying in the jewelry box .my mother had some sentimental value attached to it but there is no other way I can recover my wife's gold ornaments. At last my mother agrees to sell her wedding chain. We got Rs26, 600 for her ornaments. I also need to write authorization letter for my wife to recover her gold ornaments from bank. I have to hand over our marriage registration certificate to the court. I do not need any lawyer to fight my case…". I went to fight my case alone in Calicut. Kerala.

D-DAY. COURT PROCEDINGS..
Maya's lawyer... " My lord! Here is man who does not want to take responsibility of his wife and his
daughter. He is lest bothered about their welfare and even refuses to pay for his
daughter's education. My client does not wish to live with her husband. Allow her
to get legal maintenance allowances.Ju
Judge.………… "Do you have any thing to say"? ***************

check this link. for the rest of the story********

http://www.lulu.com/browse/search.php?_shopSearch=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lulu.com%2Fbrowse%2Fsearch.php&_helpSearch=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lulu.com%2Fhelp%2Fsearch.php&_forumSearch=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lulu.com%2Fforums%2Fsearch.php%3Fmode%3Dresults&search_forum=-1&search_cat=2&show_results=topics&return_chars=200&search_keywords=&keys=&fSearch=Jivan+lal&fSearchFamily=0&fSubmitSearch.x=0&fSubmitSearch.y=0



. Maya stayed with her daughter and spend most of her time playing with her grand daughter. She wanted to make up her lost time with Sony. I stayed at Madam's house only to look after Madam in her old age .A token of gratitude for giving a secured life to my daughter. Life was not cruel to me when I think of less fortunate parents. Today I am a happy and content person. (THE END)
An appeal to housewives.
Do you wish to help your husband to run your family? Then start working. Learn any home based work like DTP, Data Entry, Medical Transcription, Tailoring, Catering food, Chocolate and butter Cookies for Hotels, selling cosmetics and gift articles, tuition. There are lots of short term courses available on trades. Bank also offered micro finance for starting up small business. Earn some extra money to support your family. With ever increasing living cost (present and future) one man's income alone cannot meet both ends. Your husband will appreciate you. One day you will be proud of yourself. Time is running out. Act now!.
This is the Moral of my life story.
With regards,
JIVAN.

Blog Archive